ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
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