the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
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