woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
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