I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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