i don't like sucking hair
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
Randomize