Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
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