i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
