i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
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