I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Randomize
