JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
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