Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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