Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Randomize
