Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
