My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Randomize