Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
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