i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
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