I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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