There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
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