Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Randomize
