it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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