You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
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