You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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