The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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