the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
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