i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
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