Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
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