The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
Randomize