i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
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