ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
