pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
Randomize
