If I had a nickel for every time I've used a condom, I'd have... two nickels.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
God I need to hump something, right now.
Randomize
