When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Randomize
