My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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