Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize