DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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