i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
Randomize
