Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
