So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
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