Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
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