I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Randomize
