"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
Randomize
