I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
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