yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
