I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
