i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
