I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
