Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
that may or may not have been my penis.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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