If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
Randomize
