She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize
