I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Randomize
