IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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