I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Randomize
